So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Randomize
