Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
