My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
