I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
