My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Randomize
