I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I am available for nakedness
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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