Slut skills are useful in every country.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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