She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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