So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize