i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Randomize
