You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Holy sore nipples Batman
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
