hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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