the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
