how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
