the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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