Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
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