in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
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