What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
