Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
