what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
