i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
