She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
My dick has a subreddit
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize
