Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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