her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Randomize
