I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I'd cum for enchiladas.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
