im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
