Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
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