Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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