Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Randomize
