Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
