Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
