Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
It was confusing and full of hummus
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
