I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
