and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Randomize
