I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Randomize
