You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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