whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
this just has baby written all over it
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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