I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Randomize
