I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
