You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
