Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Randomize
