This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
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