Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
