? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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