At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
