I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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