this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
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