i would punch a child for taco bell
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Randomize
