69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
