so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Randomize
