White coat. Heels.
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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