They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize